#PartyGirl

Attending a huge party school for college I was constantly surrounded by late nights out, drinking, and partying. None of these are in code for managing chronic illness. I believe that everyone should let loose and let their freak fly every once in a while. That is much easier said than done when navigating health problems.

For a normal girl in her twenties, a night out might look like this:

• Get ready: do makeup/ hair etc.

• "Pre-game:" Have a couple of drinks

• Go out: dinner and more drinks... which is usually followed by going to the bars or the clubs for more drinking, dancing, and chaos.

Typically, I doubt you'd make it home by midnight, at the earliest.

For a girl in her twenties with chronic illness, a night out might look like this:

• Rest the entire day in preparation

• Nap and meditate before getting ready #zengirly

• Get ready: do makeup/hair etc, take medication

• Purse Pack: medication, salt, peppermint oil, and snacks - (these are all things I don't leave my house without, my medical arsenal.)

• Pregame: consists of electrolytes, water, a snack, and a mental breakdown

• Go out: dinner and drinks ( if you're well enough to indulge)

If there's one thing I know it's that girls with chronic illness can rally like no other. For me, going out is always contingent on health, and when I do go out I tend to spend my next few days paying for it. Naps and Snacks are HUGE for me. They are a game changer and make the difference in my ability to function.

"I think everyone could benefit from a pre-going out nap. It's a right of passage" - Ahna, my college roommate. What started off as my friends supportig me became our going out ritual. A nap changes everything. Whether you have chronic illness or not, one of my favorite memories from college is taking sun naps, couch naps, and even floor naps with my besties. Napping and snacking my way through college quite honestly got me through. If I didn't fuel my body with rest and food I would crash and it would impact my sleep levels, stress levels, symptoms and energy. You can almost alwasy find me with a snack in my hand whether its a healthy one or a box of french fries.

Nap photos from the Vault:

#roofnaps, #puppynaps, and #bestienaps

Be yourself. Illness and all.

At a certain point, I started faking it. (Embarrassing, I know...) I would go to frat parties and eventually bars and have a few sips of my drink and dump it when no one was looking. I hated drinking and it always made me feel awful but I was so scared to speak up and have my friends think I wasn't fun anymore. This became my routine for quite a while.

• Order a drink

• Take a few sips

• Dump it out

• Act drunk

I have so many photos and Snapchats from the bars I took while in college you'd think I lived it up. Which I did, but I'd be lying if I said that half of it wasn't a façade. I was almost always the first person to go home, the majority of the time I was sober, and I couldn't even make it to bars without a nap. On the occasion I did feel well enough to drink, I instantly regretted it.

My best advice to you.

One of my biggest pieces of advice for going out in college for anyone, and especially people with chronic illness is to pace yourselves. It's not healthy for anyone to drink all day into the night and then try to function off of a few hours of sleep. I know we all get FOMO (fear of missing out) but I promise, your body will thank you later.

One or two drinks for my body seemed like the equivalent of drinking a pitcher of vodka I'd feel so awful the next day. During game day season I started a routine where I would rally and join my friends for the morning and midday hours, have a drink or none, and return home shortly after for a nap and rest so I could go back out that night. The picture to the left is one of my favorites and I look so genuinely happy. The reality of this photo is:

• I'm allergic to gluten and taking a bite of a hot dog just for the photo

• I didn't finish the seltzer in my hand

• I went home shortly after and spent most of the day in bed napping before trying to go back out that night.

Fake it til you make it.

I had many more days and nights throughout college that consisted of faking it til I made it. I got so good at faking it I was able to actually enjoy myself and the front I had put on became real. I didn't have to fake drink to have fun, my friends were supportive of me being me with or without alcohol, and I was able to take the pressure away from drinking. For me drinking and partying seemed like a right of passage being an 18-21 year old. I think a lot of the time I was trying to prove to myself that I could go out, I could have fun, and that my illness didn't define me or control me.

Here is my proof that chronic illness doesn't define you. Sure, you can go out and have a drink or two. Everyone deserves to indulge. Sure, there are some nights I don't even make it out, there are others where I'm the first to leave, I have a list of meds to pack in my purse, and everything is done in moderation. However, living your life and enjoying it despite the pain, the health relapses, and in my case the spinning... IS possible. I encourage you to give yourself grace, rest when you need to, and live every second that you can.